Speak not harshly to other folk,
speaking so, they may retort.
Dukkha indeed is quarrelsome speech
and force for force may hurt you.
Explanation: Never speak harsh words. If you do, you will also be replied to in the same vein. This kind of cross-talk is painful. It may lead to an exchange of blows.
The Story of Venerable Kundadhana (Verses 133 & 134)
While residing at the Jitavana Monastery, the Buddha spoke these verses, with reference to Venerable Kundadhana.
From the day Kundadhana became a monk a certain female form accompanied him. The Venerable himself never saw her, but everybody else saw her. Indeed, whenever the Venerable made an alms-round in a village, the inhabitants would first give the Venerable a portion of alms saying, “Venerable, this is for you” and then they would give the woman a second portion of alms, saying, “And this is for our female friend.” The story goes that in the dispensation of the Buddha Kassapa there were two companion-monks who were as intimately associated with each other as though they had issued from the womb of the same mother. And in the dispensation of the Buddha Dighayu, year by year and month by month as the monks met together for the purpose of keeping fast-day, those same two monks would come forth from their lodging and say to each other, “Let us go to the hall of discipline together.”
Now at that time a certain goddess, reborn in the heavenly world, seeing those two monks, thought, “These two monks are too much together; is there perhaps some way by which I can separate them?” No sooner had she thought this in her folly than one of the two monks said to his companion, “Brother, wait a moment; I must attend to the needs of nature.”
As soon as she heard this, that goddess assumed the form of a woman and entered the thicket with the Venerable. When he came out, she followed close behind him, arranging with one hand her tuft of hair and with the other her undergarment. The Venerable himself could not see her, but when the monk who stood outside waiting for him turned and looked, he saw the woman come out, arranging her hair and her undergarment. As soon as the woman observed that the waiting monk had seen her, she disappeared. When the Venerable came up to the monk who was waiting for him, the latter said to him, “Brother, you have broken your vow of chastity”. “I have done no such thing, brother.” “Why, I just saw a young woman come out after you, doing this and that. Yet you say you have done nothing.”
The Venerable acted as if he had been struck by a thunderbolt. He said, “Brother, do not ruin me. I have done no such thing.” Said the monk, “What I saw, I saw with my own eyes. Do you expect me to believe you?” And forthwith he broke off the tip of his staff and departed. Moreover, when he sat down in the hall of concession, he said, “I will not keep the fast-day in his company.” The Venerable said to the monks, “Brethren, there is not a fleck of dust even the size of an atom on my chastity.” But the monk repeated, “What I saw, I saw with my own eyes.” When the female spirit saw that the monk was unwilling to keep the fast-day with the Venerable, she thought to herself, “I have done a grievous wrong.” And straightaway she said to the monk, “Venerable, my noble elder has not really violated his vow of chastity. I did this merely to try him. Pray keep the fast-day with him as usual.” When the monk saw the female spirit poised in the air, and heard her speak those words, he believed her, and kept the fast-day with the Venerable. He was not, however, so kindly disposed to the Venerable as before. Such was the former deed of the female spirit.
Now at the end of their allotted term of life, the Venerables were reborn according to their good pleasure. The female spirit was reborn in the Avici Hell, and after suffering torment there for a period of an interval between two Buddhas, was reborn in Savatthi in the dispensation of the present Buddha as a man. When he had grown up he retired from the world and decided to become a monk, subsequently making it his full profession. From the day he retired from the world, a phantom in female form appeared and followed him. Therefore they gave him the name Kundadhana. When the monks observed that he was followed about by a woman, they said to Anathapindika, ‘Treasurer, drive this unchaste monk out of your monastery, for by reason of him reproach will fall upon all of the other monks”. “But, Venerables, is the Buddha not at the monastery?” “He is, lay disciple.” ‘Well then, the Buddha alone will know.” The monks went and said the same thing to Visakha, and she gave them the same answer.
The monks, getting no satisfaction from the two lay disciples, reported the matter to the king, saying, “Great king, Kundadhana goes about accompanied by a woman, and has thus cast reproach upon all the rest of the monks. Drive him out of your kingdom.” “But where is he, venerables?” “In the monastery, great king.” “In which lodging does he reside?” “In such and such.” “Very well, go your way. I will have him caught.” So in the evening the king went to the monastery, caused the Venerable’s lodging to be surrounded by his men, and himself stood facing the entrance to the Venerable’s cell.
The Venerable, hearing a loud noise, came out and stood facing the monastery. The king immediately saw that phantom woman standing behind him. When the Venerable observed that the king had come to his cell, he went up into the monastery again and sat down, but the king did not make obeisance to the Venerable. The king saw the woman no more. Although he looked inside the door and under the bed, still he did not see her. Finally he said to the monk, “Venerable, I saw a certain woman in this place; where is she?” “I see none, great king.” Then said the king, “I just saw her behind your back.” But the Venerable replied as before, “I see no woman, great king.” “Venerable, just step out here for a moment.” The monk came out and stood below, facing the monastery. Again that woman stood behind the Venerable. The king, seeing her, ascended once more to the upper floor. The Venerable observing that the king had gone, sat down. The king again looked everywhere, but for all that failed to see the woman. And again he asked the monk, “Venerable, where is that woman?” “I do not see her.” “Tell me the truth, Venerable. I just saw a woman standing behind your back.” “Yes, great king; that is what everybody says. Everybody says, A woman follows you where ever you go, but I never see her.”
The king, suspecting it was a phantom, said to the Venerable, “Venerable, with much impurity following about you, no one will give even food. Therefore, visit my house regularly and I alone will furnish you with the four requisites.
And, having given this invitation, he departed. The monks went and reported the matter to the Buddha. Then, the Buddha related to them the monk’s wicked deed in a previous birth as a female spirit and preached the Dhamma.